Paper?! What am I, an animal?

Wow! So it is now May... And my last post was in February...

Bad writer, bad!

But in fairness, I have been writing, just not here. If anyone follows my Twitter, and I am judging you if you do and if you don't just to fuck with you, I have been busy both with studying for finals and wrapping up principal photography for my short film, "Great." And what do I do whenever I get busy? Put off what I'm supposed to do in favor of reading, pre-schooler hunting, drinking, stalking celebrity dwarfs or writing. In this case, I have been writing like a fiend (or at least faster than my usual rate of -1 pages a day) and I have several new skits and scripts to work on. So, I will be busy at my pool job this summer editing and writing instead doing what I am paid to do (guard lives or some bullshit).

OH WAIT, I can't! I can't type anymore at work because some shitty uncle left his 5 year-old nephew running amuck at the pool, the poor kid drowned and the jack-ass is now suing the life-guarding company I work for and my boss has instituted a hard-core no texting or laptop policy at all pools.

Now don't get me wrong, I totally understand. I think if you are an on-duty lifeguard and you are texting or playing on your computer, you should have boiling hot sand poured into your ears or your thumbs cut off for being so selfish as to endanger other people's lives so you can text your bff all about the super hot sk8er boi @ the snak-shak. OMFG!

But the thing about my pool is: nobody goes there. It is a 5 foot deep pool in a shoe-box-sized condominium community mostly full of middle-aged or older people who aren't exactly training for a triathlon or if they are, they aren't doing it in the condo's table-spoon-sized pool.

Now to be fair, that's an exaggeration. I do get this one adorable couple who come in and workout in the mornings for a half-hour before going to lacrosse practice or rugby (Did ya get it? They're lesbians! ding! ding! You win a piece of candy!) and a handful of ladies who come in and sun-bathe and gossip, but the Golden Girls are only there for like 2 hours and they rarely get in the water. And aside from the occasional snot-nosed kid visiting Gram-gram, the pool itself is not used most of the time.

So I do not see the harm in me finishing all my work for the day, cleaning and sweeping and filtering or whatever, and writing on my computer whenever customers aren't in the pool. Or even in the pool complex.

But, whatever, no big deal, homeslice. I suppose it's just back to the old pen and paper for me. It was called paper, right? I can't quit remember.